Tuesday 9 March 2010

Rain

Posted by Saras at 09:22

Summer rain pours down
Pitter patter on the roof
Hmmm… I could smell sand
SUMMER RAIN POURS DOWN
Hmmm… I could smell sand
Pitter patter on the roof
Summer rain pours down

My desperate attempt at Naisaiku
Syllable count 5-7-5 Title 5-7-5

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5 Comments:

  1. Magali Vaz said...
    9 March 2010 at 10:20  
    Naisaiku? Is that relate to Haiku? Anyway, poems are not my cup of tea but I though of dropping in.
    Wendy Naisa said...
    10 March 2010 at 15:28  
    Hi Saras, Many thanks for taking The NaiSaiKu Challenge? I really like the way you did this, and I can hear that pitter patter...

    I'm going to link you to the home page on the NaiSaiKu site
    Stan Ski said...
    10 March 2010 at 15:43  
    The smell of rainfall on a warm day, could be sand and so many other things. I can smell it right now as I read.
    Nalini Hebbar said...
    11 March 2010 at 00:56  
    'Hmmm… I could smell sand'
    can be changed to
    Hmmm..fragrant earth

    A real good attempt...Hey you have created a wonderful picture
    Andy Sewina said...
    11 March 2010 at 03:09  
    Hi Saras, I think you've done on good job on your NaiSaiKu, and you've certainly embraced the style successfully.

    Many thanks for posting to The NaiSaiKu Challenge? and I for one am looking forward to reading further examples of your work.

    aka Wendy Naisa

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